The hubz and I are taking a road trip later this month to TribeUp NYC. We plan to rent a car and make the epic drive all the way from Ohio to New York. We’re talking just under 650 miles, about a fifth of the entire length of the U.S. of A. were we to drive from California all the way to New York.
That’s much less impressive than I wanted it to be. I was thinking based on my sketchy understanding of American geography that we were driving half-way across the country. Zeus bless Google!
But even a fifth of the almost-3000 miles to drive across this great nation is a whole lot of distance. And our car is on its last legs. The hubz drives an hour to work (both ways), five days a week. It’s got serious mileage clocked. So that’s why we plan to rent a vehicle and abuse that one instead.
Of course, by “abuse” I merely mean “drive far”. I don’t mean like crash into things, or smear poop on the upholstery, or smoke with the windows rolled up (or even rolled down, because smoking in cars is gross and rude and unhealthy). The last sentence implies I regularly involve my own car in crashing and pooping events. Just so we’re clear, I don’t. There is no crashing or pooping or smoking going on in our love wagon. Promise.
Who decides to drive to New York on a whim?
Andi-Roo and her hubz, too, do!
Why would we do such a crazy thing?
Because a blogging conference – TribeUp NYC – is being held there!
Which conference is that?
WTF is TribeUp NYC?
Only the most exciting thing to happen in the blogging world!
The event promises to explain “how bloggers can convert their content, knowledge, and influence, into a product people will pay for.”
Sounds right up our alley! I will be there with my pen and clipboard, poised to take notes the old fashioned way, and ready to type them up on my laptop during the long drive home.
Speakers include published authors, renowned bloggers, highly successful entrepreneurs, and a comedian, all of whom I am eager to meet.
I’m not used to being in such “professional” company, so I hope I don’t pee my pants or anything. My hubz tells me I have to refrain from being my overly exuberant, obnoxious self, and put on my grown-up face. I haven’t seen that mask in a while though. I know I wore it to the hearing wherein we won custody of my daughter. Maybe I left it at court?
See, I have this problem. I’m very shy and unsure of myself in crowds. So what happens is this: I overcompensate by acting all bubbly and hyper. So there’s no in-between. Most people who meet me for the first time, or even the third, tenth, and fiftieth time, refuse to believe me when I reveal that I’ve had issues with depression, or that I used to be an extremely angry bitch. Even my writing style would fool you, my readers, if you didn’t already know the truth.
Being a pert and youthful and excitable person served me well in my previous occupation, wherein I worked with parents and coaches for a fabulous youth organization. That job called for keeping my game face on. And I loved it.
But now I gots to tame the lion, so to speak. I have to be fun, but not *FUUUUUUUUUUN*. See the difference?
It’s like trying to find that sweet spot between slightly tipsy and drunken whore. Or so I hear. I’ve never been paid for my services. Something to consider in an alternate life, however, according to this articulate and thought-provoking article, “How to Tell Your Parents You’re a Prostitute”, but I seriously digress.
So. I have to find a way to…
— NOT be stinky after a five-krillion mile drive when I’m sure my face will be all oily and my hair will be all stringy and my armpits etc. will need a good scrubbing.
— maintain a mature demeanor while, already not at my best appearance-wise, I will be meeting some of the most respected writers of our time.
—keep it real while attempting to take notes on the sly, nab pictures with people while my hubz grumbles about having to snap shots, stay sober, avoid over-eating, and play grown-up.
OMG. But this isn’t supposed to be about me. I mean, it’s my world, so of course everything is always about me. But I wanted this to be promotional and all I’ve done is talk about poop and prostitutes and stinky armpits. You should totally join us in New York, if only to meet the silly nitwit who manages to fit so many unrelated topics into one blog post.
Okay, couple more notes about me before I move on to serious-ness. I’m really worried over what I should wear. I don’t dress up. I mean, I have this one colorful skirt that I wore to court, and then I have this one black skirt that will probably be a good grown-up disguise, except I have no shoes to go with it. By which I mean, literally, no shoes. I own a pair of sneakers and a pair of moccasin-type things. Neither are appropriate for a black skirt. Might need to go shopping. Which isn’t in the budget. So there’s that. Okay, colorful skirt it is. Or maybe just jeans, since that’s what I normally wear out into the world. See??? I’m all aflutter.
Second note, and then I swear I’m moving on to talk about TribeUp NYC instead of myself. We will only be in New York long enough to attend the conference, and then we’ll be turning right back around to come home. No hotel stays or anything crazy like that. Even though I’m owed a hotel stay because our last couple anniversaries have been disasters. Much like new shoes, though, it’s just not in the budget.
So I need to find a way to finagle some sight-seeing into this road trip before we head back home. My two absolutes are the Statue of Liberty and the New York Public Library. The one with the lions in front, like in Ghost Busters (best movie of all time!). I’m a connoisseur of libraries and I collect library cards the way others collect knick-knacks of ceramic bears or glass angels or whatever.
I think we might be able to squeeze in these two sites prior to the TribeUp NYC conference, which starts at 12:30. Surely there’s time for a statue and a house of books. Right?
Anyway, so yeah, we’re going to TribeUp NYC
The event is Saturday, September 22. And you should totally be there. Because I will be there. And even better, the founders of Triberr (@dino_dogan and @dancristo) will be there. Plus all those other speakers I mentioned. And bloggy-growing types of things will be taught. What’s not to love?
*and there was much throwing of glitter*
My hubz just reminded me to remind you about my Atomic Tribe. Which you should join because you love me long time. It’s free and saves you the trouble of having to manually share my content. So go do that, if you haven’t already, and then sign up to attend TribeUp NYC so I can give you a big hug at the conference!
Who else will be attending? Let me know in the comments so I can be sure and chat you up while we’re there.