Here’s an example of why I hate being on Facebook. I just saw this incredibly nice person I happen to know “In Real Life” put up a poster as her status which makes me suddenly want to punch her in the titty:
How the fuck is this sign in any way Christian — which, unless I’m misunderstanding, is what the sign implies?
And anyway, I thought we were in the middle of this great anti-bullying movement? This sign feels an awful lot like some mean kids that formed a clique, put themselves in charge of the student lounge, and declared to the rest of the high school,
DON’T LIKE IT
CHOKE ON SPIT
But I’m not allowed to get into an argument with this lady, because she is a churchy, which automatically allows her room to be a disgustingly horrendous rude bitch, and if I even comment something like, “That hurts my feelings, friend!” I will get yelled at by every church on the fucking planet and told about my awesome room which is being held for me in that hot vacation destination known as HELL.
This is the kind of shit I’m talking about. Christians as a whole are granted so much freedom to be nasty and rude. Why? Why do we let them be that way?
I will tell you the answer.
We let them be that way because we are NICE. And we operate under Christian principles better than the fucking Christians do. And we share our toys. And we ensure everybody gets a cookie, even that freak sitting in the corner all alone. Yeah, I see you, buddy. You get toys and cookies, too. No worries. I’m not going to make you leave.
The Christians might. But the rest of us won’t.
Look, asshole who made up that sign, and all assholes who shared it thereafter — who the fuck put you in charge? Maybe you didn’t notice, but you got outvoted, dumb-dumb. We don’t like your bossy God. He’s an asshole. Anybody who has followers like you passing on the so-called “Good News” either needs a better P.R. agent, or else a new shtick altogether because this message is old and no longer applies.
How about this sign instead:
I mean, isn’t that what America is really supposed to be about? Coming together in spite of all our differences? We can’t come together if you’re being a meanie-pants, asshole, so cut it out!